Doubt isn’t the Problem: Deconstruction vs. Deconversion – An ePistle by Ryan Braught – DEVOTION: A Blog by Brethren Life and Thought

A few weeks ago I listened to the bonus episode of the “Rise and Fall of Mars Hill” podcast that featured Joshua Harris. For those who don’t know, Joshua Harris, back in the ’90s was the author of the book “I Kissed Dating Goodbye.” A few years ago, Harris began to wrestle with the damage that his book had done to people along with the purity culture movement. Not too long after that he and his wife decided to end their marriage. And just a few short days later Harris posted this statement on his Instagram account, “I have undergone a massive shift regarding my faith in Jesus. The popular phrase for this is ‘“deconstruction,” the biblical phrase is ‘“falling away.” By all the measurements that I have for defining a Christian, I am not a Christian. Many people tell me that there is a different way to practice faith and I want to remain open to this, but I’m not there now.”¹ It seems like Joshua Harris didn’t just kiss dating goodbye, he also, for now, has kissed Christianity goodbye.

Marty Sampson, a prolific songwriter who has written worship songs for the likes of Hillsong, Delirious, and Young & Free, now believes that Christianity is just another religion. In an Instagram post, which has since been deleted, (what’s with people using Instagram to share their “de-conversion” stories?) Sampson says, “Time for some real talk, I’m genuinely losing my faith, and it doesn’t bother me. Like, what bothers me now is nothing. I am so happy now, so at peace with the world. It’s crazy. This is a soapbox moment so here I go … How many preachers fall? Many, No one talks about it. How many miracles happen. Not many. No one talks about it. Why is the Bible full of contradictions? No one talks about it. How can God be love yet send four billion people to a place, all ‘coz they don’t believe? No one talks about it. Christians can be the most judgmental people on the planet—they can also be some of the most beautiful and loving people. But it’s not for me.”²

Jon Steingard, the former singer and guitarist of the Christian punk rock group Hawk Nelson, also posted on his Instagram page, which has since been deleted, that he no longer believes in God. Steingard says in his post, “After growing up in a Christian home, being a pastor’s kid, playing and singing in a Christian band, and having the word ‘Christian’ in front of most of the things in my life – I am now finding that I no longer believe in God. The last few words of that sentence were hard to write. I still find myself wanting to soften that statement by wording it differently or less specifically – but it wouldn’t be as true.”³

Paul Maxwell, a former Desiring God contributor, a former Philosophy professor at Moody Bible Institute, and Trinity Evangelical Divinity Ph. D graduate also announced on Instagram (where else), which has been since deleted, that he was not a Christian anymore. He states in a video, “I love you guys, and I love all the support and friendships I’ve built here [Instagram]…I think it’s important to say that I’m just not a Christian anymore, and it feels really good. I’m really happy…I’m really happy.”⁴

I could continue and share about others who have been through a period of deconstruction which ended up in their conversion. I can share about Kevin Max formerly of DC Talk, who has said that he has been deconstructing his faith for decades. I can share about Abraham Piper, son of famed New Calvinist theologian and pastor John Piper, who uses his TikTok page to post videos about the deconstruction of the Christian faith to his over one million followers. I could share about singer Audrey Assad who announced that she no longer identifies as a Christian. But I could also share many stories of people, people who aren’t celebrity Christians who have quietly gone through their own period of deconstruction. Some of these people have come out the other side and continue to follow the way of Jesus. Some of these people have come out the other side, and no longer identify themselves as Christians. As church leaders, many of us also hear the statistics about the number of people leaving the church, the percentage of people who identify themselves as the Nones (people who have no religious affiliation), and the fact that our country is rapidly moving into what people have termed as a post-Christendom society.

There seems to be something in the water currently in regards to what many people have defined as deconstruction. Now when I write the word deconstruction, I am not using it in the way that French Philosopher Jacques Derrida uses it. Deconstruction, according to Derrida, “argues that in Western culture, people tend to think and express their thoughts in terms of binary oppositions (white/black, masculine/feminine, cause /effect, conscious /unconscious, presence/absence, speech/writing). Derrida suggests these oppositions are hierarchies in miniature, containing one term that Western culture views as positive or superior and another considered negative or inferior, even if only slightly so. Through deconstruction, Derrida aims to erase the boundary between binary oppositions—and to do so in such a way that the hierarchy implied by the oppositions is thrown into question.”⁵ Instead, I am referring to deconstruction the way Brian Zahnd in his book “When Everything is on Fire: Faith forged from the Ashes” uses it, “The term is used to describe a crisis of Christian faith that leads to either a reevaluation of Christianity or sometimes a total abandonment of Christianity.”⁶ But deconstruction doesn’t always equal de conversion. Many people, including myself, have walked through periods of deconstruction, not so they could chuck the faith, but so that they could seek to be faithful to the way of Jesus. Over the last 20 years, I have done some rethinking and deconstruction in many areas including atonement theories, eschatology, hell, biblical interpretation and inspiration, and the Kingdom of God. Many times it did feel like I was losing my faith but so far, each time, I have come out the other side, hopefully, more faithful to the way of Jesus.

Social Media in the last few months has been full of conversations regarding deconstruction. Many people are talking about it from many different angles. You have certain pastors (or gatekeepers) who like things the way they are and who see deconstruction as either threatening or have defined deconstruction as de-conversion. A few weeks ago Matt Chandler stated this in a sermon, “You and I are in a day and age where deconstruction and the turning away from and leaving the faith has become some sort of sexy thing to do. I contend that if you ever experience the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ, actually— that that’s really impossible to deconstruct from. But if all you ever understand Christianity to be is a moral code, then I totally get it. And if you find yourself in that spot, I’m telling you, I love you right now, and we’ll sit down with you and you don’t have to punt on this thing. You might not have ever tried it.”⁷ You have pastors who are going through their own deconstruction, in real-time, amid ministry- and because of the cultural moment that we are in. And you also have many people who are either sitting in the pews silently asking questions- questions about biblical interpretation, theology, race, gender, power, and a host of other issues, or who have silently left the pews having no one to talk with and help them wrestle with the things that they were struggling with.

Deconstruction isn’t just something that is being played out in the threads of Twitter or in the life of people both in our pews and in the world itself. No, deconstruction is something that happened within the pages of Scripture as well.

In Genesis 32:24-28, we read,

So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. 25 When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. 26 Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.”But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” 27 The man asked him, “What is your name?” “Jacob,” he answered. 28 Then the man said, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.”⁸

We see Jacob renamed Israel because he struggled and wrestled with God. We should all wrestle and struggle with God. We should go to the Scriptures and wrestle with the meaning of the text. We should go to God in prayer. Ask those hard questions that you have been dealing with. God is big enough to handle your questions, your doubts, and your struggles.

In Acts 10 we find the story of Peter’s vision while on the rooftop. He had been told all his life that Gentiles were unclean and shouldn’t be associated with. Then he had the vision of a sheet being let down from heaven with all kinds of unclean animals and hearing a voice telling him to eat. But the previous teaching was so ingrained in him, that he actually tells the voice of God that he won’t eat unclean animals. And the response from the voice of God is, “Do not call anything impure that God has made clean.” Through this experience, Peter deconstructed his previous belief about Gentiles, and when Gentiles show up to his house to take him to visit the centurion Cornelius he goes with them and states to a house of Gentiles, “You are well aware that it is against our law for a Jew to associate with or visit a Gentile. But God has shown me that I should not call anyone impure or unclean.”

And just one chapter earlier, in Acts 9, we find the dramatic conversion of Saul. We see in 9:1 that Saul was breathing out murderous threats against the followers of Jesus. In fact, in this chapter, his sole purpose was to find followers of the Way and put them into jail. Until he had an encounter with Jesus himself. Following that encounter and the faithful presence of a disciple named Ananias, Saul had scales fall off his eyes, got baptized, and became a follower of Jesus. That is a story of deconstruction of previous beliefs.

And lastly, we find Jesus helping his disciples in the process of deconstructing when, in many places during his teachings, he says 11 simple words that open up the process of deconstructing former beliefs. What are those 11 simple words? “You have heard that it was said…But I tell you…” Jesus was helping his disciples rethink their previous assumptions about things like murder, hatred, adultery, lust, divorce, oaths, and many other topics that the disciples thought they had a handle on because they were taught thins things since they were little. But Jesus upends their understanding, and actually walks with them through the deconstruction process and out the other side.

So we have basically talked about the what of deconstruction, the who of deconstruction, the when of deconstruction, and the where of deconstruction. But this leaves two questions left. The why of deconstruction. And how do we help those in the process of deconstruction?

So why does it seem like, with a nod to Brian Zahnd’s book, that everything is on fire? Why do we see such an uptick in conversations about deconstruction, people de-converting from Christianity, and people going through the process of deconstruction? I believe there are several reasons why.

One of the first whys of deconstruction is because of church hurt. According to Joshua Ryan Butler in his article “4 Causes of Deconstruction” at The Gospel Coalition website, “Many who deconstruct have been wounded by abusive or manipulative church leaders, or generally unhealthy church cultures.”⁹ This could be leaders from your own faith background (your Youth Pastor, your Sunday school teacher) or it could be someone you looked up to and consumed their sermons (like Mark Driscoll, Bill Hybels, or Carl Lentz). People who are hurt by the church go through a process of deconstruction because they know what the church should be like, but their experience of the church doesn’t mirror what it should be like.

Another reason for deconstruction right now is syncretism in the Church. And, primarily, we are talking right now about the American church. That people are seeing the Church become a place of Christian nationalism,¹⁰ white supremacy, anti-science, etc. That the Church and the Christian faith becomes less important to someone’s identity than whether they are Democrat or Republican. The political persuasion then colors their Christian faith rather than not vice-versa.

A third reason that people are walking through a process of deconstruction, is one of the more prominent philosophical questions ever asked. What about the problem and existence of suffering and evil? If God is a good God why is there suffering and evil in the world? All one has to do is turn on the TV or jump online and see the brokenness in our world.

Fourthly, we are seeing the increase of people walking through deconstruction because of theological crises. Many people are asking deep theological questions about the cross, the existence of hell, the Bible, gender, sexuality, the end times, etc…

And lastly, people are deconstructing the faith because they are trying to follow their conscience. They are trying to figure out a way to follow Jesus amid the cultural crises we are in (the pandemic, global unrest, political division, racial unrest, etc.). And many times, they are asking these questions, not because they want to sin, or that doubt brings street cred (like Butler’s article “4 Causes of Deconstruction” says) but because they are seeing people they have looked up to who have taught them about Jesus, living in a way that isn’t, to them, congruent with the life, mission, ministry, death, and resurrection of Jesus.

So the question remains, how do we walk with people who are in the deconstruction process? Here are a few thoughts about how we can be a helpful presence in people’s lives.

First, most people going through the process feel like they are doing it alone. Normalize the process in conversations, in sermons, in newsletters, etc. Help them to know that deconstruction is normal and can be a healthy means of growing in their faith.

Secondly, and closely associated with the first, is to walk alongside those who are deconstructing. Don’t let them try to do it alone. Let them know that there is a community who is walking with them. Meet with them regularly, listen to their questions, pray with and for them, and point them to appropriate resources. Maybe even get a few people together who are in the process, so they know that they aren’t alone.

Thirdly, be open to questions. Many people ask, “How can you ask those questions and still be a Christian?” It’s almost like people were taught that they should question things or doubt. But the opposite of faith is not doubt, it is certainty. Share your questions that you are currently exploring. And let them know no question is outside God’s sovereign love.

One of the values that Veritas, the community of which I am a part, holds is that we want to be a safe place to seek truth. And part of our mission is to pursue truth with honest expression. These values (and, part of our mission) have been a catalyst for trying to help people explore questions in an open and safe place. In the past, we have held Elephant in the Room nights. Elephant in the Room nights are nights where people bring their questions about God, Jesus, faith, theology, etc. and we spend time talking through these questions. Not so much to come out with an answer, but to let people ask the questions and realize they aren’t alone in asking them. And that as a Christian, you can ask hard questions of God and of each other. Again, God is big enough to handle whatever question we throw at him.

Point them to appropriate resources. A few resources that have been helpful during my own deconstruction include:

“When Everything is on Fire: Faith forged in the Ashes” by Brian Zahnd
“Benefit of the Doubt: Breaking the Idol of Certainty” by Greg Boyd
“Letters from a Skeptic: A Son Wrestles with His Father’s Questions about Christianity” by Greg and Edward Boyd
“Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes: Removing Cultural Blinders to Better Understand the Bible” by E. Randolph Richards and Brandon J. O’Brien.

There are more resources (books, podcasts, articles, etc.) about deconstruction. Google deconstruction and Christianity and you’ll find a mix of helpful and not helpful resources.

And lastly, help people to see that the goal of deconstruction is not the demolishment of their faith but the renovation of it. Zahnd puts it this way, “Healthy deconstruction is not an end in itself but a necessary, if messy, stage on the way to something better.”¹¹ Help people to work on renovating their spiritual house so that the house looks more and more like Jesus, which is the end goal of what being a follower of Jesus is all about. And that is what the end goal of deconstruction should be really all about.

Ryan Braught is the Pastor/Church Planter of Veritas. Along with his wife and kids, he founded Veritas in 2009. He is the husband of Kim, and father to Kaiden and Trinity. Ryan has a BS in Telecommunications from Kutztown University and a Master of Arts in Religion from Evangelical Theological Seminary. Besides his work with Veritas, Ryan loves to read, listen to music, snowboard, and spend time with his family.